Progress in Mediocrity

I managed to snag a great deal on a clarinet this summer to complete my basic woodwind trifecta. I haven't played much in several years, but I know it's easier for my students to learn an instrument through hearing a model. So here I am, practicing my clarinet fundamentals again. It's certainly easier this time than when I first picked up the instrument during my undergrad. But I sound mediocre. Actually, mediocre might be generous. I sound pretty bad, a mix of Squidward and some kind of very angry bird. I know that's normal, I've had a clarinet in my possession for two days and learning an instrument takes time. The basics are coming back to me pretty quickly, and I've been able to play through most first and second year band music without too much trouble. My sound is getting better. I'm noticing and changing some weird embouchure tendencies that will help me play more advanced music. My fingers are starting to know where to go and when in familiar tunes.

Even as a mediocre clarinetist, progress is possible. In fact, I think progress is easier to see in mediocrity. Going from playing a tune with three squeaks to zero is a very clear measure of improvement. Being able to play a song ten clicks faster than I could yesterday is a clear measure of progress. There's something to be said for remembering how it feels to wield an instrument that isn't quite comfortable yet, to feel the discomfort of muscle fatigue and unfamiliar sensation. Clarinet isn't foreign, it's very similar to flute and saxophone, both of which I play at a better-than-mediocre level. But it's different enough to force me to remember what it's like to be mediocre.

Mediocrity is hard! It's frustrating to see so much clarinet music that I can't play yet. To have to stop to look up fingerings when less common notes happen. To have to play slower-than-slow on a piece I could play at lightning speed on another instrument. And solving major musical problems (squeaks, incorrect notes, etc.) is much more exhausting than fine-tuning the details as I would on flute. No wonder my students get frustrated with the process.

Playing an instrument takes practice. There's no changing that. Looking beyond mediocrity is not that easy when you're in the thick of it, trying to remember the fingering for G-sharp for the third time and keep your teeth on top of the mouthpiece. But progress is possible, progress is rewarding, and progress will happen. Instrument fundamentals are an exercise in patience just as much as a physical exercise.